Educational Decisions

Academics often pose a host of challenges for troubled teenage boys. The work itself is difficult, and they would rather do pretty much anything else. Aside from the course work they struggle with, the schooling environment itself often exposes them to peer pressure, bullying, and a host of temptations.

If a boy who is known to get into a lot of trouble is in a public school system, there's a pretty good chance his parents are going to be consulted about, and likely pressured into having an I.E.P. (Individualized Education Plan) created for him. This plan will, in essence, say your son is an exception to the standards expected of his peers. In other words, that your son can't be expected to do the same amount of work as everyone else in the same amount of time everyone else has to do it in. The I.E.P. may say your son needs help with his tests and reading his assignments. It basically places a label on your child that encourages him to play the victim card. "Dad, I realize everybody else got their paper turned in two weeks ago, but I'm not like them. Everybody at school knows it. That's why I have an I.E.P."

 The problem with that is that when your son gets into the real world, potential employers aren't going to show him any favors because he had an I.E.P. in school. They're going to expect him to meet the same requirements as the rest of their employees, and if he can't, he will be unemployed. My suggestion is to reject I.E.P's and say, "No, I don't want the standards for my child to be lowered to that below what is normal for his age-level. I would prefer him to attend regular classes and to be held to the same expectations as everyone else in that class."

Depending on how much trouble your troubled teen gets into, there's a good possibility that at some point, the school will expel him and make it sound as though he has to be enrolled in an alternative school. That is never a good option for a troubled boy. It will place him in an environment where there are no good role models in his classes. Where he will be surrounded by other troubled teens all day long. What could possibly go wrong, right?

If you want to get away from the public school sector, which I would highly recommend, there are two main options to take into consideration.

The first would be a private school - for example, a Christian school. If you can find a school of like faith, this might be an excellent option. Your son would be learning the same core subjects as he would in a public school but have teachers who believe in God and teach from a Christian perspective. He would also have at least some classmates who are believers and who would hopefully encourage him to make better life-decisions. The downside, unfortunately, is that a lot of private schools end up enrolling kids who have a history of getting kicked out of public schools. That can obviously bring about its own set of difficulties.

The other option is to home school. If you have time, you can do this yourself. If you do, I would recommend using a paper-and-pencil curriculum instead of a computer-based on. That is so you can eliminate the temptation to use the internet to cheat or to access pornography. If you don't have time to home school, you might be able to hire someone else to home school your son on your behalf. Check your state laws to see what requirements, if any, you have to meet in order to educate your child at home.