Training Troubled Teenage Boys

Academics often pose a host of challenges for troubled teenage boys. The work itself is difficult, and they would rather do pretty much anything else. Aside from the course work they struggle with, the schooling environment itself often exposes them to peer pressure, bullying, and a host of temptations. If a boy who is known to get into a lot of trouble is in a public school system, there's a pretty good chance his parents are going to be consulted about, and likely pressured into having an I.E.P. (Individualized Education Plan) created for him. This plan will, in essence, say your son is an exception to the standards expected of his peers. In other words, that your son can't be expected to do the same amount of work as everyone else in the same amount of time everyone else has to do it in. The I.E.P. may say your son needs help with his tests and reading his assignments. It basically places a label on your child that encourages him to play the victim card . "Dad, I reali...

Why would a relatively unknown small-town Montana preacher by the name of JR Thompson spend so much time writing blog posts offering tips for those raising troubled teenage boys? That's a good question and I'll try to answer it the best way I know how! God. There's your answer. No, I couldn't stop there. That wouldn't suffice for very many of you, would it? But it is true. God is the reason I write this blog.   You see, when I was a teenager, I despised my peers. I was that awkward, skinny, nerdy guy who had the big glasses, the big nose, and teeth that were too big for his smile. I was the guy with the high-pitched voice, no athletic ability, and the annoying personality that made it hard to find friends. I suppose you could say I was despised and rejected by my peers. For that reason, I hated being around anyone under the age of 25. I just knew they would find something to make fun of me about, and they wouldn't have to look very hard to find a thing or twenty...

When working with at-risk teenagers, technology can be your best friend! It can help you monitor your son's behaviors and it can protect you in the event he makes allegations against you or anyone else in your home, especially when he's corrected for wrong doing. If you have a sneaky teen and haven't looked into security systems, you should! Let me share a little of what I've learned over the years. I'm not trying to sell you on anything so I'm not going to include links to any specific products, but just give you an idea of what's out there. First, there is software out there that businesses use that will enable you to put a program on your son's laptop or tablet that will record every keystroke and every screen he looks at. You can log into something on your own computer and check 100% of his computer-related activity at any time you'd like and he will never know it! Just install it on the laptop or tablet before you give it to him! Secondly, eith...

When kids are little, parents employ a variety of discipline tactics. Time-out chairs, standing with their nose in a corner, tapping the back of their hands, making them go to bed early, etc. They try to gauge the child's reaction to different forms of discipline, and learn to use whatever discipline seems to bring about the best results. But for whatever reason, when boys get past the age of 10 or 12, a lot of parents say, "The only thing you can do from that point forward is take away privileges." But there's a problem with that. Troubled boys, when they hear, "You can't play video games," find a way to get that video game and play it anyway. When they're told, "You can't leave the house," they'll sneak out. When they're told, "You can't use your cell phone," they'll get a hold of somebody else's. If you have that type of son, you need some consequences in mind that he has to accept. Physical exercise wo...

Like it or not, there are plenty of parents out there who are abused by their own sons . They're afraid to tell their son no because of what he might do them. They're afraid to enforce rules. They're afraid to stand up to him. They're afraid to go to sleep at night. That's because they're raising a boy who has difficulty controlling his temper. If you're that parent, I assure you, you're not alone. When you fear your son, he's going to walk all over you. It's hard not to fear him when he's put his hands on you though, isn't it? It's hard when he's used a weapon. It's hard when he's knocked you down. It's hard when he's threatened your life, and he's bigger than you are. A boy that has serious anger issues needs a lot of help - and fast. If you've already tried setting boundaries and giving him consequences for anger outbursts, and that's not getting his attention, you're going to need to spend a lot...

  From the time boys enter school, their parents are encouraged to have them evaluated for a hyperactivity disorder because teachers, who are limited on how they can discipline, don't know how to handle a child when he still has all of the energy God has given him. So they say, "I believe your son has ADD or ADHD. I believe he needs to be put on some medicine." Unfortunately, telling a child he needs medication to control his hyperactivity is going to lead to a teenager or young adult thinking he has to put something in his body to help him every time he goes through one of life's storms. I know the world says medication is the answer, but if it is, why are kids on medicine still often placed in classrooms with a small number of children because they still can't be handled? If medicine is the answer, why do they have to have the meds changed and increased all of the time? Do you realize there are doctors out there who diagnose children with ADD and ADHD and other...